To family: I'm just washing my d*ck, what's the problem!!? To a friend: F*ck you! You think I'd forget that you had 45GB porn in your Storage!?(honestly that was true lol)
To everyone (since at 35 i dont feel i need to make excuses): What? So my fap material is kind of extreme and runs the gauntlet in both perversion and sexuality, you try being a wizard and we will see how weird your fap choices get after going down the rabbit hole without real human companionship.
Guys, this is coming from a person with a extremely volatile mother: when stared at, FIB Er, oh Mom! This knife i’m holding over your face in the middle of the night isn’t what it looks like! I was practicing knife throwing, and your face looked awfully like a target! I didn’t eat it- it went into my mouth with help of Newton’s first law! Eh? That box of chocolates was a donation from Santa! How dare you accuse me of such things! All with a straight face, of course.
What anime is this??? To everyone: long philosophical reason to confuse them and make them reconsider humanity’s moral standards